StrEaM oF ConsCiousNess

what it is to write? to me i have yet to discover if i even have the will to do this or the capability. am i talented? do i know what it is that i am doing? for everyone at some point in their life comes to these questions, and many times they do not receive the answer they wish. we are all told from a very young age that we are capable of doing whatever it is that we please. but that is a bunch of bullshit....not everyone has the ability to do whatever it is that they set out to do. i for one could not run across the mojave desert, perhaps if i trained for years i could, but at this point in my life and with the actual desire i have to not run across the mojave (or any desert) for that matter, it seems unlikely. children are lead to believe that everyone of us could become president one day (but no one tells them that half the time it is the most incompetent of them that will reach this goal)...or the prejudices that are against all of us that can lead one way or another.

writing is one thing that anyone in their right mind should be able to do....do well on the other hand is a whole 'nother story. this is not just your everyday blah blah blah happy writing. this is just putting what is coming into your head at lightning speed down on a piece of paper (or as many these days like to call it, a computer screen)....it is something that yes we all can do....but how we do it, when we do it, why we do it and if we really can do it comes into question? the ability to actually read and spell is a big factor in this whole writing thing. the ability to communicate to someone else what it is that is going on within your head....that also comes into play.....and for those that write just for themselves, well that is an art all unto its own.....half the time that is the most creative writing out there, but it can also be the most bizarre and hardest to understand. the writing that is being pulled from deep inside....not just the superfluous crap that skims the top of the brain and just shoots out like its nothing....

to truly know what it is that you are doing, you have to have no idea what it is you are doing.....go forward, moving back, these are all a mystery to you on this journey....no way that you can know your destination before it has even been reached.